We wake up every day wondering how to have a successful life. We start with a list of things to be fixed, corrected, and filled in. We start out every day with what is missing.
We become practiced in approaching life that way. And then we wonder why we feel insecure, scared, or unsafe. There’s no level of trust. What we’re really saying to ourselves, if we are being honest with ourselves, is that we don’t trust ourselves or anything else, and that is what is informing our entire approach to how to have a successful life.
There’s a big emotional quotient to this. You have to be honest about how you are feeling about yourself. Do you have the confidence that you can steer your ship, whether it’s a fleet or a rowboat? If the answer is no, if you don’t trust yourself, then you want to think about your outlook—the rest of the world is going to look pretty threatening.
The most freeing thing I’ve ever experienced is increasing the level of trust I have in myself. I can listen to others and make my own determinations about their counsel, but at the end of the day, I trust myself. It doesn’t mean I won’t make mistakes; but I will trust I will do my best and that my best is enough. And I’d say that’s how to have a successful life. It means I will trust whatever arises from my decision; that I will be accountable and responsible. I will trust that I will make a decision not just for the benefit of my own success, but when I make a decision based on the success of everybody else, that’s pretty great success of my own, too.
What you do once you’ve reached the edge of your comfort zone is what sets you apart from others as a leader and a human being. We all have blind spots. The StillPoint Experience is an online, interactive assessment that will show you yours. Learn more.
Seeing it through the eyes of the horse: We know that to be successful, they need freedom, movement, consistency, safety, play, and food. If I help them be successful in all that, chances are, our relationship will be strong. They can trust me. You then have a visceral experience of what trust feels like. If you can experience that here with the horses, you can start to make personal or professional decisions from another point of view—being empathic to another’s needs, as well as your own, is a building block for how to have a successful life.
You can apply this principle to any arena of life. If there is a lack of success, chances are there’s a lack of trust. Invest in building trust—in yourself and all your relationships. It gives trust fund a whole new meaning.
Learn more about how to get introspective in our blog about reaching your full potential.